well. performance over. i watch the jing wu men vid and saw me "doong dooon da" away. still cant erase the counting habit of mine when dancing. it was a good day for most of the people but not all. saw the sad look on some faces. they will come back stronger next time. the bonds between them may also have grown stronger cuz of such an incident. be it success or failure, it is impt for friends to go thru all these together so juz cheer up and continue dancing with joy and passion. success will come next time.

hahs. even though i might not be close with them but i do treat everyone as friends la. like ann said, "no matter how many different cliques are there in nra, we're all friends"

and THANKS joyce, ll, wq for coming down. our numbers are getting lesser and lesser. time to get busy during school days again. summone no camp this year. 1 year 8 mths b4 they are out from the army. lol. take care u all. =)

tml no sch so i shall go find my little sis. she must be bored out already. see u!

SHITTTTTT LA!!! I BLOGGED FINISHED AND I ACCIDENTALLY DELETED IT. FUCCCCCCCKKKKK. 2am liao and i have to reblog! JI DAN LA! STUNNNNNED!

lecture'ed, workshop'ed, library'ed, studio'ed, dance'ed, rehearsal'ed, mac'ed, bus'ed, walk'ed home, bath'ed, sleep'ed,

fuck it. i have to try to rmb everything i typed juz now. du lan. fuck fuck fuck. FUCK FUCK FUCK. fucking NOOB HANDS of mine.

anywae. i loved today too. met up with dance frenz, went to studio, had dance class and rehearsal. this are the only 4 things which can keep me happy in sch. well, u won't expect me to love lectures tutorials workshops and project meetings right? had a suprise for ann juz now for her ROM tml. it's nice to see how close this family is. =)

tml have performance at harbourfront at night. but have to report to sch by 12pm. dunno if RJT's going to watch. haven meet up for sometime le. shall do so when we're all free. =) and my retard MEI also. 9pm call back her den nvr pick up. dunno is sleep so early or wad. this week very busy. paiseh la.

alrights. i dunno wad things i've missed out. i noe the mood is totally different from the the entry juz now. pissed off man. write finish den POOF! everything gone! tio stun.

u went to a beach and swam too far away,
relaxed and started sinking,
struggled in the water.
u noe how to swim,
but in that moment
the fear of drowning juz creeps all over you,
making u cant swim.
there's someone infront and u expect to be rescued,
but the person dosent seems to notice you.
you only have 2 choice now,
conquer your fear and start swimming back,
or sae BYE BYE!

juz describing how my life seems to be now. it's complicated. how to get back the courage u've once lost? it's a hard question which i've yet to find the answer.

LOL. there goes my motivation for GPA of 3.9 this sem. have been late for 2 tutorials today and yest. cuz of fuc*** up traffic jam. yest took 961 ann jam all the way from the start of woodlands rd. den today take 187 den highway also jam. got car accident i think. heng my tutors are lenient. still gave me attendance. didnt really pay much attention to the tutorials though. =x lectures are juz the time and place for me to take my nap. blahs. so gg. but at least i aint chionging any games now. LOL.

anywae, i'm so hooked up with dance. so much wanna go to studio to hang arnd whenever i'm done with my lessons. thinking abt how i started dancing, it was during my sec 2 time. eh, no! actually was during sec 1. when i 1st formed a group with my classmates to come up with a dance for a geography event. eh! NONO! it was during pri 6! LOL. that tym dance para para for pri 6 farewell. LOL. PARA PARA. OMG. anywae. i dun do those para para in arcade.

aiya. i started to like dancing from sec 2 la. with wz ter yy and ys who were my classmates at that tym. we saw nsync's mtv and started copying their steps for dance. we didnt noe how to learn dancing that tym so juz copied the steps and try it ourselves lor. catching steps from videos is so hard la. we started with the song "it's gonna be me" followed by "bye bye bye" and "pop". den almost every free time in sch will juz play the song from cd player and dance lor. think the class also watch till sian. LOL. if i ever see the video of me dancing at that tym i will feel its so noob la. cuz all i knew abt dancing was juz doing the steps correctly which aint wad dance is supposed to be la.

yea. and i continued watching other mtvs to learn their dance steps throughout my sec sch life. until the day where i saw nra at np's open hse. it was like i found the place where i can really learn dance la. so thank God that i got into NP and joined NRA. hehs. my sec sch dream, which was to progress on dance, had came thru and i'm enjoying every single bit of it now. now my dream is to continue to improve in dance until i am so old that i can dance no more. LOL. it's a lifetime passion for me. hehs.

final thing. changed my blog song to "Cry me a river" by JT. it's an old song budden it's one of the song in JT's 1st album. he has been the dancer i looked up to since he went solo after nsync disband. well, he's the price of pop afterall. hehs. dance class tml! woots! time to watch bleach epi 123.

POP


It's Gonna Be Me


JT My Love / Love Stoned

omg. look at the groove.

ONE MORE!
JT Like I Love You

DANCE. i feel good just to be in the studio with all those ppl.

ADDICTED-

1stly, pls take a look at this.
http://tinypic.com/view.php?pic=2v3pu38
lol. it's a picture of how the future mrt routes will be. so many freaking stations rite? hehs. it'll take damn fast to travel to pasir ris from woodlands next time liao.

anywae. i seriously enjoyed the past 2 days. it was FUN. starting from sunday, i woke up and came online lor. haven decide whether i wanted to go sch to meet the others for self prac. so i chatted with gen on her tag board. rofl. until 3pm liddat decided to go sch. reached le me wj bw and kf at studio rot 1st. wj was kinda taking at nap doing wall split while we 3 others using comp. danced abit while waiting for david. he brought his junior along to teach her basics for monday's audition la. den we keep dancing the lyrical choreo taught on friday lor. willie came soon also. den david junior left and we ordered mac for dinner la. suddenly, came KELVIN. we all like so suprised. how come sunday he also come back. den he sae he always walk pass studio to check if got ppl de. rofl. so eat finish, we all dance the lyrical choreo again. den came an idea to take video of it. with new choreo included. den tt's where all the fun begins. we did all kinds of funny things when taking the video. there was this "lion head" which was the 1st guy la. LOL. and we end up playing soccer game. whoever lose has to go to the middle and freestyle. kf help took lots of videos of it also. dun think i gonna upload them here larhs. hahs. i juz now i had hell loads of fun. =)

monday.
it was kinda the 1st day of sch for me la. IS started from 9am and ended at 11am. supposed to be from 8-12 one la. and i go into a group which i dun really like cuz they like planning on doing a big scale project la. i hear them discuss i also stress. shall see how. after IS i went home 1st b4 going to yewtee meet gen. there was sharon + ivan + pearlyn today. we went yewtee mac den i ate my 2nd lunch of the day and slacked there lor. at 1st kinda sian lo. that gen keep walking here and there. cant stay still do her hmk properly. den the other 3 were talking and taking photos among themselves. den after that me and gen moved back to sit beside them. and all of us started talking abt damn funny things. really funny and di***. that sharon 14 nia talk abt all those so loudly in mac. bth. LOL. after that i left and headed to sch to watch auditions. today got much much more ppl la. i think more than 70 came ba. not sure of the figure. after that the jingwumen peeps went to 73 to prac cuz of sat's performance. fun fun fun. feels good to prac for a choreo together with ur own performing group. got the sense of teamwork. we prac till not bad la budden the best is to able to make ppl WOW at ur performance la. so need much more prac together. after prac we start "TAO POK"ing ppl. for those who dunno wad that means. it means we grab 1 person push on the floor all stack above the person. LOL. super tiring and funny can. finish liao den me wj bw ron alex kelvin went kap mac to have supper and den went home. time to sleep. still got 6 hrs till wake up time. nites!

i dare to say that, i LOVE dance.

went down to sch early to watch auditions and stayed at 16 to do some self prac. was supposed to stay with them but i got summoned by my sis to jurong point. lol. walked around with them. slacked at mac, den at long john den go arcade. dun really like hanging in arcade though. dun like all the noise. unless i'm enjoying playing some retarded games with my frenz. after that arnd 6+ i took mrt with them and they alighted at yewtee while i took all the way to pasir ris for my relative's chalet. tired till slept in mrt till very song. hahas. didnt stay over there, came home and online till now. quite a boring entry huh. lol. gg sleep le. nitez!

HAHS! i like today's dance class super lots. the 1st choreo was damn nice. lyrical hiphop. the accent super duper nice. i have to improve in getting the steps right. coordination! tml going sch watch audition for the freshies. shun bian train my popping as well. hehs. =) good nights den. hope i sleep early.

it's hard to continue,
but it's also hard to give up.
whichever i choose,
i know i'll still be stuck in between.
i told myself to give up 8 days ago,
but it still bothers me.
well, the only thing i can do is to ACT.
act as if it's non of my concern.
or someone PRO and KIND out there pls teach me how to handle this.

hmm. i skipped 3 out of 4 days of sch for the 1st week liao. not that i want to, but things juz happen to clash. all those busy stuffs shld end by this week le. morning woke up at 9+ to prepare for gen's bdae. bought cake at cwp and den went to her sch lor. think it wasnt really a suprise la. since she heard so much abt it le. hahs. by the time i reached there, she and her frenz all playing with water and flour la. i got flour'ed abit by that retarded bdae girl. hahas. den proceeded to lot 1 to da bao food. they bathed and den went for their sports day le lor. while i came back woodlands, bought ink for my printer, came home to take text book for ys and gging to sch for dance le. POP all the way. i want to improve in dance and specialise in an area. it's been 1 year since i joined nra.

and once again. HAPPY 14th BIRTHDAY GENEVIEVE KOH HUI QI. 14 sounds so young. well, i 17 still behave like kid. worst. HAHS. see you soon!

i feel so pissed off today for i dunno wad reason. maybe is becuz of rotting at home today. feel damn pek chek with every thing. got those damn du lan feeling. rofl. tml got dance. woots.

blahs. haven update for quite a while. forgot wad i did sia. i wanna go train my popping so better faster blog. well. i met up with gen and sharon on sat to go for qiting bdae bbq. met like 1030am in the morning la. went to jp to search for her present budden cant find suitable de. so shld be giving it to her next time. reached east coast arnd 1pm. and i was kinda sian so volunteered to look after the things and ask them go cycle. rofl. felt so lazy that i actually lied on the stone bench and fell asleep. arnd evening liddat they start fire le den i start to become active. more ppl came. gen and sharon was like talking so crudely with qiting's frenz till quite funny la. the expressions qiting's frens gave was like feeling so suprised by the way gen and sharon talk. lawl. shi dai bu yi yang le. nowadays de youngsters not as innocent liao. HAHS. well. they took lots of photos of themselfs using my phone till batt flat =.= here's the only one below with me inside. ok i admit i had a stupid look on me. blahs. and gen's dad gave us a ride home. thx huh. and girl, pls control ur sms ok. 2500 sms a mth is kinda crazy. even my mum saes u're san pat. LOL.

Sunday 15th April and Monday 16th April

WOAH. it's tonning night at school! hehs. met jingwumen peeps at town to get our black bandanas. i'm glad that i'm communicating more larhs. if not know them for almost 1 year liao still anti social. bao wen, choy, kelvin left after we get bandana den e rest met willie and followed him to get his nitendo ds at lucky plaza. wa laus. till that day den i noe hor businessman so jiao hua 1 leh. they name the starting price like so cheap liddat. budden actually haven add in all those neccessary items. like the nitendo ds he sae $180. but nvr include charger, memory card for gaming and GST. den from $180 end up become $236. so ppl, if u all wan go those kind of non official electronics store buy such stuffs. pls ask clearly for the price for all neccessary items. hahs. so weijie, xing, peg went home 1st to change b4 going back to sch while me and wil go find "bunny" to get nds games. he got his nds to play so i take laptop out play the dumb fm game lor. hahs. reached sch arnd 10-11pm i guess. it was kinda fun to ton at sch la doing our own stuffs. i slept at 5am den woke up at 7am go wash up and help make balloons for deco. den went back studio for final preparations b4 performance. i was very nervous can. 1st time performing in such a small group and den didnt really fully rehearsed at the student plaza area. the music was definitely slower at open area la. i still dunno timing got off anot. budden overall performance wasnt up to expectations la. failed this tym but still have to cont to jiayou.

Tues 17th April

It's uvPHS SYF day. they have been preparing so much for it. and everyone was hoping to get something they deserved. me and the other alumnis went to vch early in the morn to support as well. 1st was catholic high and they performed damn well led by nelson. really is pattern more than badminton. and they got gold with honours which i thought they deserved. after watching uvPHS, i thought getting silver was not a problem and probably could have been a gold. but the unexpected results came. it was a bronze. i guess most of the juniors heart sank when they heard the results being announced. i wasnt there with them though. it was PURE CRAP that they got bronze which other choir with lower standards got it too. i aint pro enuff to be a judge but i noe they deserved to get better for their performance that day and all the hard work put in. the standard was there but the results wasnt. anywae. they did their best and there's nth for them to regret. juz hope they get wad they deserve next time.

The Family

took bus back to phs and den went back to np. slacked at booth awhile den gen called me and off i go to yew tee mac. slacked there and den went back to np again. LOL. i abit too free huhs. had dance class at night. cant really concentrate well. not sure why. and i messed it all up when being asked to face the back to dance. and i CANT BELIEVE that i actually juz walked away with my mind blank. it was really WTF??? bahss. better prac more b4 the next class. i have to learn how to relax and dance but not thinking of next step all the time.

TODAY, Wed 18th April

it was the FIRST day of sch for me. cuz i ponned the last 2 days. i said i wanted to chiong for GPA 3.9 this sem and den 1st 2 lecture i attend i wasnt paying attention liao. ROFL. nvm. i will make sure i dun slack around playing games de. left sch at 5pm to go home take ys bdae present and meet everyone at amk. it's YS bdae on 19th and we're helping him celebrate. at nyny again. guess wad. it's the 1st time in 17 years his frenz help him celebrate bdae leh. he shld be touched man. LOL. LOTSA PICTURES MAN. MOSTLY RETARDED ONES. we laughed like mad ppl in nyny. heng its those shelter type seats. so can hide abit.

FOOD

ys: eat la!

nic: mai la!

ys: oi! my bdae cake u wan eat anot!!!

nic: OKOK!

LOL. they didnt sae that. i added in myself.

everyone gets a piece of cake.

getting retarded.

The Bday Boy

and finally a proper photo.

tt's all for the day. i have no sch tml! hehs. but haf things to be done. shall post jingwumen's pic and vid for cca fiesta performance when i get them. later then!

TOO TIRED TO BLOG. WAIT FOR TML. AND ALL E BEST TO UVPHS.

i need more and more of D-A-N-C-E
more and more new choreos.
and performances & competitions are definitely motivation bonuses.
and i've so much so much to improve on. my flexibility is the worst now.
body isolations, groove, feel and ONE more retarded thing. is that my mouth cant stop following the beat. juz like someone who dosent noes how, but is trying to do beat boxing when dancing. den my senior realised that and told me. rofl. after that i tell ann den she took a tissue and ask me to bite it when dancing. it worked damn well. rofl. everyone must be wondering why i biting tissue when dancing. hahas.

tml meeting gen they all for qiting bdae bbq lor. hafta wake up early. shall watch finish naruto ltr den go sleep.

it's over & i shall get back.

don't make me wait for nothing pls.
i wonder if i can believe those words.
u might think that way but i don't.
and i don't noe whose fault it is.
perhaps everything would be fine if it hadn't started at all.
but life would have been still, if not for this.
maybe i would just have to wait for "things go wrong" to turn into "things go right".

its early but i seriously have nth else to do. juz watched finish bleach 121. i guess my brain need a rest. shldnt ill treat myself that much. time to go lie on bed and fall asleep.

i noe wad's the greatest problem in me as a person. is that i FREAKING DON'T ASK QUESTIONS. wadeva questions or unclear stuffs i have in my mind, i juz don't like clarify with people. "assume and guess" tt's wad i do, which causes all these uneccessary troubles within myself. freaking nerd me. and i self discriminate alot. sth's wrong with me which i dun even bother to get it right. born in me or grown-up influences, i don't care. i know i can get it right if i TRY to put such low self confidence away. but i ain't trying. all i noe is to say "wait".

P-A-T-H-E-T-I-C

LOL. guess wad i did when i not playing game or chatting with anyone. i playing with my dumb in built camera. took damn retarded photos of myself. but of cuz i not going post them except for 1. hehs. kinda so called zi lian.


anywae. this photo was taken during the work shop last sat with instructor Yiu.

and 1 of the not so retarded photo i took. the retarded ones are really retarded. this one cant even be counted as retard. only rjt ppl noe how retarded i can make my face like. rofl.

it saes L-O-L

hehs. had dance till late night again. it's nice larhs. it's getting on to me now. p-a-s-s-i-o-n =) well. nth to blog abt actually. tml having self prac for item again. pray for me that there is bleach out tml and naruto shippuden out on friday pls. i'm starving for them.

34 and tt's it.
i deserve something better. =)

had dance class today. and i'm performing for cca fiesta next monday. dun wish to screw up. since i'm given the chance, i shld make full use of it. if not i will dissappoint those who gave me the chance to.

thought abt it.
i dun think i'll ask for anything.
it's fine for me this way.
or maybe i'm juz scared.
it's alright, there isn't love.

i'm out of the league

bahhhs. i dunno wad to do now so come and blog. sian arh. tired budden dun feel like sleeping yet. maybe 1 more round of dota den go sleep. not xi guan to sleep early. =x

yest went sch to have a dance workshop held by Yiu from Hong Kong. and after that went to meet joyce and lilian at town since convenient to go from sch. lawl. go there and all of us dunno where to go and wad to do. den joyce keep niam niam niam. sae qu na li. den eh here and there for nth. LOL. at the end we from far east walk to toy'r'us at paragon see see. hahs. den arnd 630 i went off and their frenz came. went to cousin hse to have dinner. was so tired on the way home that i slept while sitting in the mrt. and had a headache.

today met gen and her frenz at cwp. =) watched meet the robinsons. quite nice larhs. i give 3 1/2 stars upon 5. brought my laptop along cuz sharon wanted do her hmk but at the end dun need le. =.= so they juz surfed the net while we were eating at mac lor. and retard mei. u got sch must early wake up so dun ki siao talk on phone till late late and machiam wan die le. lol. pei'ed her home and tt's all.

woot! can use internet alr. so happy la. dumb laptop tio virus till cant online. reformat and everything's ok. hehs. well well. here goes.

7th April Good Friday
met RJT at 6pm at cine to watch stomp the floor dance compy. and none of the other guys go. ys cant go out too much. nic sae see how end up nvr pick up phone. most guys still in army except wh. wh sae anything at 1st but at the end sae not going le. so i meet ll and joyce 1st while wq sl xl all came later. those in 88 in la. LOL. nvm if u dun understand. it's juz a joke between us. hahs. den kelly was with joyce and ll and den ll sae she calls me dustbin. cuz i everytime wear till very "la ta" lawl. den hor watch the compy for arnd 2 hrs den end. i like the performance by the kids, da street soulz and rough addicts most lor. and some dancers alot showmanship. not going to comment abt any bad things though. cuz i ownself also dun have the standard yet. den ate at cine and went walk along orchard road lo. we crapped and talked wadeva we can think of as usual. till the point almost everything also share wont scared each other not interested abt it de. but most of the stuffs can be funny still. hehs.

8th April
woke up early to go give flyers. actually from 9-1 but only work from 930-1230 so 3 hrs lor. den went city hall meet dota frenz. got dota outing la budden i only meet those i noe nia. arnd 40 ppl go lor. played lan at penisula plaza. from 230 play till 730 liddat. den me k3nr3n nub tk go back cwp to have dinner. saw bj with qiao yun at cwp too. and den i came home and reformat my comp lor. since so despo to online. hahs.

wells. have been walking home from woodlands mrt for quite a while again. and as usual i will listen to songs and den think abt stuffs on the way home la.

actually. to me. i would prefer to spend time with ppl i like, for the day. rather den to do very happening and fun stuffs with ppl i not close with la. i might be very active in those fun stuffs budden wont be happy 1 la. blahs.

and.

i miss RJT.
i miss uvPHS.
i miss HER.

spending time with these ppl is enuff to make my day. =)

not to forget _nef and imp. chatting with them b4 go sleep.

quite tired alr. gonna blog fast and go to sleep. woke up near 3 today and den online till 5 and prepare to go out. met my dota online frenz. knew each other for quite some time alr. 3 years liddat? shall juz put their nicks here. afk[crap] aka NoLag, tantk, ^AI, k3nr3n, iAlicia aka Imp and Ringo`Pai. got alot more frenz budden they didnt come la. and that _nefariel!!! who suggested the dinner didnt make it. cuz he sleep in army and sign imba lots of extras. had to do duty till 10pm. lawl. so we all met at woodlands mrt control station. heng i now more socialble den last time. got initiate to talk if not i will juz stone and paiseh there cuz 1st time see them. so we went up foodcourt to have dinner. i had POTS&PANS. quite nice la. the soup is nice. hehs. after dining we couldnt decide wad to do so juz walk walk and end up in timezone. only imp and k3nr3n played. some basketball game. since we all dota frenz, only noe dota dunno got wad other similar interest so damn hard to decide wad else to do la. + cwp no more lan shop. nth much to do 1 lo. i left cwp at 6.30 to go lot 1 meet gen. hehs. it's great to see her again la. always cheerful and di siao at the 1st sight. and we took bus from lot 1 to jurong point which took quite long lo. her cousin and her cousin's fren were also with us. reached jp alr den go gv see wad movie to catch and den gen haven 16 cant watch reaping. so her cousin and fren watched reaping den i pei her go watch mr bean hols lor. rofl. it was nice budden not so nice la. kinda sian. more suitable for short clips rather than a movie la. the movie ended arnd 1030 and den we went back up to wait for her cousin lo. and that poor retard slipped la. all cuz of that stupid puddle of water. hahs. had to give her a helping hand. lawl. blame that stupid puddle of water. sharon came and gen passed her hmk den they went arcade play for 10 mins liddat den me and sharon had to CHIONG off to catch the last train to jurong west. really chiong. heng we caught it.
ya tt's all for the day. =)

tml i'm meeting RJT again to go cine catch stomp the floor dance compy. go support rough addicts man. hehs. nitez all. going 5am le. shag.

shall wait and see. =)

hahs. juz reached home not long ago. anywae i'm down with flu la. think yest got alr. so yea i woke up and met ys at woodlands mrt den go khatib meet joyce and ll. went mac buy breakfast and go up her hse play mj. no money though la. juz play for fun. if play money ll sure cham. cuz she play till lose all her chips. lmao. den play from around 11 till 1 plus. had a good time chatting and laughing and scolding each other la. HAHA. arnd 2 liddat all sat at sofa wait ll bathe. den i put my head on the sofa edge to rest till fall asleep. rofl. was damn tired la. didnt sleep properly last night. i even got haunted in my dreams la by those stuffs. haiya. hack.

anywae. we walked around taka and dunno wad cap to buy for him la. ltr buy too exp de if he dun like jiu dunno how so went far east go make 1 custom made de for him. lawl. at 1st the person sprayed the name wrongly la. HOLAS become HOYAS. LOL. met nic at orchard mrt and proceeded to city hall nyny. wanqi was late so we ordered 1st. the food was ready juz nice by the time she reached but she havent ordered. lawl. and we ate 1st. i ate some penne with roasted chicken which tasted damn nice larhs. finished eating and each of us took candy floss to eat. well i ate it like a kid. rofl. ys and nic had to go home 1st so left me wq joyce ll. walked to millennia walk and bought some candy from candy empire. not for myself budden for the one who called me DUMBO CHAN since she likes chocolate so much. will pass it to her if i meet her tml. went up to the dance studio to see if wq's idol + fren was there budden cant see him. and den i started sneezing non stop. haha. so decided to go home. and while on the train, they asked me to experiment sth with my hands. to see how sweaty my palms are. so i wiped off the sweat until whole hand dry and den AMAZINGLY + HORRIFYINGLY the sweat start coming out as soon as i wipe lor. and i nvr wipe my hands for 10 mins den is like super sweaty le. like those cold drinks with ice den the glass outside with all those water vapour liddat. and they asked me go see doc lor budden once i reached home i go search for "sweaty palms" under wikipedia and found out this.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shallow_breathing

this is the reason why i have sweaty palms i guess. cant breathe properly. hahs. so i think i'm fine la huhs? anywae. have been chatting with my gaming frenz recently and it's super funny k. keep laughing to the comp. and i'm meeting them for dinner tml.

You are seeking an affectionate relationship, offering fulfilment and happiness. You are capable of powerful emotional enthusiasm. Deep down, you are a kind loving person, always helpful and willing to adapt yourself if necessary to realise the bond of affection that you desire. But you need the same consideration and understanding from others and it is this need that will sometimes hold you back... so let go, trust and you may pleasantly surprised at what happens.

let go and trust. this is so true to me. cuz i'm still restricting myself to try and love someone.

hahs. woke up so early to go ll hse. and took this test the SECOND time.

You are seeking an affectionate relationship, offering fulfilment and happiness. You are capable of powerful emotional enthusiasm. Deep down, you are a kind loving person, always helpful and willing to adapt yourself if necessary to realise the bond of affection that you desire. But you need the same consideration and understanding from others and it is this need that will sometimes hold you back... so let go, trust and you may pleasantly surprised at what happens.

You are feeling very disillusioned at this time and you feel that you are being left out of things. You know - or you think you know - what you want, but you seem unable to exert the effort to achieve your objectives. As a consequence, you are feeling left out and neglected. You would like to be afforded greater security and fewer problems.

Nothing seems to be going right for you and you are thwarted every way you turn. You are not at all happy with the situation but it would appear that there is very little that you can do about it at this time. Sit back and let the situation take its course, because at this time you feel that there is nothing you can do to change whatever needs to be changed.

Whatever you strive to do, something always seems to be holding you back. There is no subterfuge in you. You are a clear thinker and all you demand from life, in a relationship, is a partner whom you can trust and with whom you can, together, develop a foundation of trust based on understanding. You are your own person and you demand freedom of thought to follow your own convictions. You have no interest in 'two-timing' and all you seek is sincerity and 'straight-dealing'.

You wish to be left in peace... no more conflict and no more differences of opinion. In fact you just don't want to be involved in arguments of any shape or form. All you want is for 'them' to get on with it - and to leave you alone.

lawl. why does it seem so bad now that i took it. the colour thingy is quite true huh. well. the link's below.

http://www.paulgoldinresearch.com/cg/index.htm

omggggg la. i fucking cant get to sleep. i feel so dumb. fak fak fak. lie down on bed and i will think of every SINGLE dumb things i've said and done. FUCKING DUMB CAN. this is the 1st time i feel so dumb in my life pls. the 1st time i've really become such a loser. i totally lost man. i shall be optimistic. be glad that now i noe how it feels like when i totally LOST. L-O-S-T & D-U-M-B. this will be the 2 things haunting me for the next few days b4 i can actually get over with everything. FUCK IT.

i'm glad i'm meeting RJT tml. they make me forget all my woes. and i can really talk non stop of craps and enjoy laughing non stop. APRIL 17 pls come. i want to see uvPHS again. alrights. here's the post dedicated to RJT in my old blog. hahas. the sooooo LONG post.

http://www.woshijj.blogspot.com/2006_12_01_archive.html

lol. i juz realise i'm dumb. serious. but anywae at least now i noe this kind of things can happen. dunno wad for i put in such hopes. hahs. dumb me. getting myself to think so much. nahs. its OK. at least now, i can forget abt those useless stuffs. the train hasnt gone for long so i think i can still catch it and continue on with my journey. hahs. only DUMB ppl like me will understand wad i talking. anywaes. shall go bathe and sleep. later wake up going ll's hse to play mj den afternoon go get nic's present and den have dinner at amk hub's nyny ba. and btw. WHO's FREE ON FRIDAY NIGHT AND WAN ACCOMPANY ME GO CINE. WATCH STOMP THE "sth" competition. dance class cancelled cuz it's public holiday and ann asked us to go watch it so PLEASE contact me if u dun mind. NITEZ.

it's all my own dumb assumptions.

hahahahhahahahahhahahahs. full of things this week. no need stay at home grow white hair. ltr going dance. tml meeting rjt. thurs meeting irc friends for dinner. fri at night got dance. sat going dota outing from noon. sun got dance workshop during afternoon. 2 more weeks sch reopen le. YEAR 2 LE! wonder how life will be at np. hope can get to noe more ppl ba. i haven hang out with my poly class mates during the whole hols man. lawl. and freaking singnet man haven come.

contradicting. my mindset changes everyday. crush pawned me.

BAH.

shall blog about past 3 days. since friday.

friday 30/3/07

i forgot wad i did. i think i slept till 4 plus. oh shyt. i blogged abt friday. LOL. anywae nvr blog abt this part. i didnt go for dance class cuz i went to tts hospital visit my grandpa. took mrt to novena and alighted. i dunno novena got SHOPPING MALL. OMG. how nerd can i be??? lol. cuz i nvr alight at novena mrt station de. and dunno tts is juz beside. anywae. my grandpa was admitted there and got into some icu. when we visit he looks ok le. juz cant move his right leg. =x mum asked me if it was scary to see such things happen to kins. i replied "hai hao la" ( for ppl who dunno. out of 10 things my mum ask me i reply 9 times "hai hao la" LOL. for example food nice anot. and blah blah blah ) budden it was really quite sad case la. the fear of losing family members. aiya. i also dun wish to talk much abt it here. let's move on to sat.

sat 31/3/07

met gen and her bro to have breakfast at mac which ended up as lunch instead. lawl. den went cwp and they sold pens. i juz followed around. was damn tired though. sell till around 7pm den we go to jurong west entertainment center had dinner. and they went to the arcade. and i saw 2 retardeds playing game like crazy. LOL. after that went home april fool others and got myself april fooled.

sun 1/4/07

went tts hospital again visit grandpa again. change ward le. and his leg can move le. walked around the shopping mall with parents. and den go back cwp. i had my hair cut at jean yip. lol. so many salons there i dunno which 1 to go. den see most ppl le juz go lor. my hair still long la. i dunno how to style hair if not power liao. lawl. came home and didnt have my keys with me so went to cousin hse find parents get. heng near. and now i'm at home chatting on phone. blah blah blah.

THIS IS REALLY WTFBBQ. THIS 1ST TIME IN MY LIFE. I GOT TRICKED LIDDAT. THANKS ARH. TO U NOE WHO! EVIL PEOPLE. OR RATHER EVIL WOMEN.

12am and i began tricking ppl online. budden small small tricks within 1 min. and i opened a conver with rjt and told them i cant make it for syf on 17th april. budden within 1 min i sae april fool joke le. and while we were chatting. suddenly this came.

` LILIAN - HAPPY MOMENTS. says:
this is so irritating. stop saying about gen can? everything gen gen gen. TMD!!
     ¤aLtiMa¤ ™     |     Senkei, Senbonzakura Kageyoshi      |        鬼鬼      says:
people jealous liaos
*
* ` LILIAN - HAPPY MOMENTS. has left the conversation.
*
┐('～`；)┌¤dotdotdotz¤™╮(─▽─)╭ - http://unitedvoicesphs.blogspot.com - More impt than the future, is the present says:
wa
┐('～`；)┌¤dotdotdotz¤™╮(─▽─)╭ - http://unitedvoicesphs.blogspot.com - More impt than the future, is the present says:
burst liao
┐('～`；)┌¤dotdotdotz¤™╮(─▽─)╭ - http://unitedvoicesphs.blogspot.com - More impt than the future, is the present says:
lol
* joyceee ` - ; TRALALA(: says:
!!
* joyceee ` - ; TRALALA(: says:
wahseh.
┐('～`；)┌¤dotdotdotz¤™╮(─▽─)╭ - http://unitedvoicesphs.blogspot.com - More impt than the future, is the present says:
pms ar she? lol
     ¤aLtiMa¤ ™     |     Senkei, Senbonzakura Kageyoshi      |        鬼鬼      says:
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
     ¤aLtiMa¤ ™     |     Senkei, Senbonzakura Kageyoshi      |        鬼鬼      says:
M
* joyceee ` - ; TRALALA(: says:
...
* joyceee ` - ; TRALALA(: says:
omg.
*
* ` LILIAN - HAPPY MOMENTS. has been added to the conversation.
*
* joyceee ` - ; TRALALA(: says:
eh you okay?
* joyceee ` - ; TRALALA(: says:
hellooo?
` LILIAN - everybody's changing. says:
that time always PS PS.
` LILIAN - everybody's changing. says:
always gen gen ge.
` LILIAN - everybody's changing. says:
*gen
` LILIAN - everybody's changing. says:
hais!!!
jiajuN. says:
.
jiajuN. says:
i always ps?
jiajuN. says:
zzz

wtf??? ys was at there april fool april fool. wh saes she PMS? and i sae she where got so PRO act till liddat 1. and JOYCE. U EVIL. at there ACT. ACT ACT ACT.

* joyceee ` - ; TRALALA(: says:
!!!
* joyceee ` - ; TRALALA(: says:
WAHHH.
     ¤aLtiMa¤ ™     |     Senkei, Senbonzakura Kageyoshi      |        鬼鬼      says:
april fool april fool
* joyceee ` - ; TRALALA(: says:
i never see lilian angry before.
     ¤aLtiMa¤ ™     |     Senkei, Senbonzakura Kageyoshi      |        鬼鬼      says:
april fool la
jiajuN. says:
same
     ¤aLtiMa¤ ™     |     Senkei, Senbonzakura Kageyoshi      |        鬼鬼      says:
she playing a fool only
jiajuN. says:
she this type
jiajuN. says:
will act till so pro meh
jiajuN. says:
i think serious
* joyceee ` - ; TRALALA(: says:
wah you think she so free come april fool ah.
* joyceee ` - ; TRALALA(: says:
yaloh..

AND

* joyceee ` - ; TRALALA(: says:
see her nick!
* joyceee ` - ; TRALALA(: says:
o.00

PLUS

* joyceee ` - ; TRALALA(: says:
ehh.. wiat ah i try adding her.
*
* ` LILIAN - everybody's changing. has been added to the conversation.
*
* joyceee ` - ; TRALALA(: says:
hello you! you alright?
* joyceee ` - ; TRALALA(: says:
lac yo
*
* joyceee ` - ; TRALALA(: just sent you a nudge.
*
` LILIAN - everybody's changing. says:
......
*
* ` LILIAN - everybody's changing. has left the conversation.
*
* joyceee ` - ; TRALALA(: says:
):
jiajuN. says:
gg
jiajuN. says:
S
* joyceee ` - ; TRALALA(: says:
she ignore me

WTF JOYCEEEEE. AND I THOUGHT REAL AT THERE FUCKKK MYSELF NON STOP. AND THEN...

` LILIAN - everybody's changing. says:
http://iwilltreasure.blogspot.com... GO READ!!

STILL ACT FIERECE SUMMORE. GO READ!! GOSU.

THIS IS WAD I SAW. FROM LILIAN'S BLOG.

"MR CHAN JIA JUN!
YOU THINK ITS FUNNY??!!



































ACTUALLY I THINK ITS REALLY FUNNY!!!









HAPPY APRIL FOOL DAY MY DEAR FRIEND! (((:









YOU CAN CONTINUE WITH YOUR GEN THINGY ALR! HAHAHA!"

OMGWTFBBQ. WAD's THIS SHIT. GIRLS ARE THE MOST EVIL BEING IN THIS WORLD. CAN REN XIN TRICK ME FOR HALF AN HOUR LIDDAT. IMBA. LOL. CRAP CRAP CRAP. I AM PAWNED MAN. THANKS ARH! CREDITS TO JOYCE AND LILIAN.

WAD A APRIL FOOL FOR ME. when it's only one hour pass 12am.